The excerpt below is from Let’s Be Friends, a unique friendship journal for girls written by mother/daughter duo Blythe and Calyn Daniel. Discover how you can help your daughter overcome rejection as an adult or a child. Share this article with your daughter today.
One of the hardest things we go through in life is facing rejection and not losing who we are. Rejection can start as young as elementary school and continue into adult life. The sting of someone not accepting you, especially in friendships, can cause you to doubt yourself and your unique place within a friendship.
I (Calyn) have experienced rejection from my friends at school and even though it has hurt, it has made me stronger in the friendships I do have. Rejection never will feel easy. It’s a painful, defeating feeling. And the worst part is that girls won’t even realize that they hurt you unless they experience rejection themselves. However, it is a part of being in a friendship. Friends will change and friendships will change over time. But God knows the friends who are right for you, and he will help as you call out to him and grow as a person even through rejection. God wouldn’t allow rejection if he didn’t know that it would help you find the right friends.
As an adult, I (Blythe) still face rejection in friendships and in work-related relationships. Do you feel as though you have been navigating life around rejection? I want to be stronger through rejection not bitter because of it.
Some of the ways God has shown us to look at the rejection we face is by:
- Recognizing how Jesus kept going in spite of the rejection he faced. He didn’t let it slow him down.
- Recalling that rejection is another person’s response to who you are that speaks to their character not yours.
- Understanding that God will never reject you and shows you his faithful love every day.
- Learning to widen your circle of friends with people you may not have even thought you would connect with.
- Sensing the strength you bring to others because God has created you, and he knows where you will bring your influence.
How are you handling rejection you have faced in your life? Maybe your child is experiencing rejection and doesn’t want to do certain things like go to social events or school because they feel alone or sad.
One of the things that helps me (Calyn) is that whenever friends reject us, we can remember that those aren’t our real friends and that God will show us our true friends. And that doesn’t mean those other friends are mean or bad, they just aren’t the friends for you or me right now. God has set you apart, and you are different from those around you. Sometimes being set apart means that we choose friends who value the same things we do, like having a relationship with God, being honest, and being a true friend.
We want others to like us, and it hurts when they don’t show that they approve of us or care about us as much as we care for them.
I (Blythe) have noticed that when I put my hope in someone to come through for me other than God, then I am saying “God, this person in my life is more important than you.” And that’s something I have to be aware of because that’s not how I want to live my life.
What about you? Is there someone you need to pray for or let go of your holding on too tightly because their rejection has stifled you? The good news is that we don’t have to give someone any area of our life that is reserved for God to fill.
May you be encouraged that even if you are rejected, no one can take away the fact that you are worth more than the value any one person can place on you. God sees you as honorable and worthy and often will show you why rejection from one person may have been protection for you to have a different friend, another business relationship, or spouse. Let’s keep seeking God above anyone else and when rejection does come, ask ourselves how we can grow stronger through it!
Written by a mother and daughter for mothers and daughters, this uplifting devotional offers girls advice on how to find and maintain mutually beneficial friendships that affirm their faith and build their self-esteem.
Making and keeping good friends are lifelong skills that will help girls grow up to be emotionally and spiritually healthy and enable them to use their God-given gifts to bless the lives of others.
Girls will learn how to recognize the differences between a good and a bad friend, what to do when others hurt them, staying true to themselves, and many other important aspects of friendship.
Each devotion includes engaging insights on friendship from Blythe Daniel and her twelve-year-old daughter, Calyn, thoughtfully selected Scripture verses, words of encouragement, and questions for further reflection with ample space to write down answers.
Fun and engaging, this book will help girls confidently say, “Let’s be friends.”