As we’ve grown on this parenting journey, we’ve had the privilege of meeting some amazing moms and dads—though trust us, they didn’t start out that way. All of these incredible parents have three things in common.
1. THEY PLAY TO THEIR STRENGTHS.
These strong moms and super dads take the time to learn their parenting strengths, and with increased self-awareness, they overcome the challenge many parents face: comparing themselves to other parents. This challenge is not unique; it plagues many parents.
The good news is, as we embrace our strengths, we grow in confidence, competence, and creativity. We see more options when we face challenges, we have more energy to meet the demands of parenting, and we are inspired to stay the course, even when things get hard. We can’t wait to tell you more about how to use this book to learn and apply your parenting strengths.
2. THEY STOP BEING THEIR WORST CRITIC.
Let’s face it: If you’ve been a parent for one day, you’ve already learned you are going to make some mistakes. Add a few thousand more days, and you are looking at a heap of failure. News flash: It comes with the territory. Parenting is challenging and not a perfect science. Strong parents come to this realization and learn how to let go of the unrealistic expectations they set for themselves and embrace the journey and destination of being the best parents they can be. This requires learning and growing and a lot of grace.
As part of my business, I (Brandon) often speak to rooms filled with industry, nonprofit, and governmental leaders. Through these talks, the issue of self-judgment comes up often. Each time I ask how many of the leaders present would acknowledge that they are their own harshest critics, many hands go up. To this, I offer a solution: Resign your position as the strongest voice of criticism in your life. In fact, literally writing that letter of resignation might be a good thing to do right now.
Being hypercritical is different from being driven and self-motivated. Those last two are great qualities. However, when your inner voice shifts toward negativity and bullying, you are being hurt more than helped. As a qualifier to this plan, I remind these leaders of two realities: We are not objective, and there are other people who, unfortunately, will be critical of us.
When these leaders let go of self-criticism, they are more effective and lead with greater confidence. It’s the same outcome for parents.
3. THEY DON’T QUIT.
No matter what, these strong moms and super dads stay the course and give their best to be their best. Incredible parents understand that when it comes to raising their kids, their job is to see it through—all the way. It’s a life commitment. As long as they are still in the game, the game never ends. These parents lead the way, showing their incredible kids how to become amazing adults who will live full and fulfilled lives, well-equipped to be strong contributors in their households, communities, and societies.
We believe more parents want to be incredible! They want to see what is strong in their kids instead of what is wrong in them. You can be a strong mom or super dad by identifying your unique parenting strengths and live out those strengths in specific, useful ways that are healthy and fruitful for you and your family.
Brandon and Analyn Miller are successful business owners, authors of Play to Their Strengths, and the parents of seven children They are passionate about seeing families engage a strengths-based parenting approach that unearths the uniqueness in every child and empowers positive parent-child relationships through every stage of life. Brandon is a Certified Strengths Coach through the Gallup Organization and the CEO of 34 Strong. Analyn owns and operates the Analyn Miller Group, part of Keller Williams Realty.
Their new book, Incredible Parent: Discover Your Parenting Strengths and Raise Your Kids with Confidence, is out now.
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